There have been a couple of things that have stopped me writing much here in recent months. The first, which is not insignificant, is a lack of either the time or the energy. The other is probably the main reason, which is that everything else seemed to be crowded out by thoughts of my job. The job which I was so looking forward to starting last summer turned out to be far from what I hoped and has really made me miserable. It might seem that writing would be a good outlet for that but I have seen too many cases of employees getting into serious trouble for venting about their job online, and rapidly becoming former employees. Those who venture into work related blogs tend to do so, rather sensibly in my opinion, on an anonymous basis, and even then seem to get caught out with worrying regularity. It will have to suffice for me to say that it was not the right job for me and that has impacted a great deal on my life outside work too. It is therefore with huge relief that I am now counting the days until I can walk out of there for good (at time of writing there are 49 working days left!)
One thing that I hope won’t get me into trouble is to write about how excited I am about the new job I will be starting in September. The building and surroundings are beautiful, standards are high, and most importantly the atmosphere in the school is friendly and calm. I am doing just the hours I want, about half a timetable and it is not too far away. So I am waiting to see what the drawback is, there has to be one! In addition to that I have another small job which has been organised through the university where I am going into a school one morning a week to teach A-level further maths. Things are definitely looking up!
I will be back soon with an update on my two scarily grown up girls.
My Girls
Sunday, May 03, 2009
Monday, August 11, 2008
Happy birthday Caitlin!
Six years ago today I met you for the first time. So often in those early weeks I looked at you and marvelled at all you would learn. I looked at your tiny hands and found it hard to imagine that one day they would have the skills to write your name.
Those years since have gone by so fast and I am so proud of the girl you have grown to be. Your smile lights up my day and a cuddle from you takes away my stress.
Those years since have gone by so fast and I am so proud of the girl you have grown to be. Your smile lights up my day and a cuddle from you takes away my stress.
Monday, April 28, 2008
A horrible crime, and a sense of injustice
Violent and senseless crime is always distressing to hear or read about, but the murder of Sophie Lancaster in August last year has affected me on a deeper level than usual. I don't pretend to be grieving for Sophie; I didn't know her, but the circumstances of her death have left me with a profound sadness.
This bright, pretty young woman had a promising future ahead of her. She was taking a gap year before starting an English degree at university. She had recently moved in with her boyfriend of several years, Robert Maltby, a talented art student. All of that was snatched away by a group of teenage thugs who found it entertaining to attack first Robert, then Sophie, and kick them both into unconciousness.
According to the reports, Robert and Sophie were walking home from a friend's house late one night when they fell into conversation with a group of five teenagers. At first the group were friendly but suddenly one of them decided to turn on Robert and the rest of them followed. As Sophie held Robert's head in her lap and pleaded with the attackers to stop, two of them turned the violence towards her. This sickening and unprovoked attack resulted in both Sophie and Robert lying comatose in hospital with severe head injuries. Sophie never recovered and died two weeks later. Robert has only made a partial recovery.
The more you learn of the details of this crime, the more revolting it becomes. Brendan Harris, one of Sophie's murderers, and his mother, were laughing and joking during his initial arrest and police interview. The court reports and police press statements talk of this as being one of many examples of a total lack of remorse on the part of all five attackers. The teenage witnesses who testified against the attackers did so in the face of real fear of recriminations. Sophie's family were jeered at outside the court. This would be all be sickening enough if it were adults involved, but those who committed this hideous crime and acted as though it were a badge of honour are CHILDREN. They are all now aged between 15 and 17, so it is possible some of them were as young as 14 at the time of the attack. I teach this age group, and I am in no doubt that they are still children. How does it come to be that children can see this behaviour as something to entertain, to laugh and joke about, whilst their victims and their families try to pick up the pieces of their lives?
I know that the main reason that Sophie's murder has particularly affected me is because of the reason that the group decided to attack her and Robert; that they were dressed differently. I don't see Sophie as being that different from the 20 year old me. If you had met me when I was 20 you would have encountered a bizarrely dressed final year maths student. I would probably have been wearing a tie dyed top, long skirt with a paisley pattern, 14 hole Doc Martens with rainbow laces, and an enormous green army surplus coat. Add in the waist length hair of a colour that would stop traffic lights and four pairs of earrings (I liked the piercing thing but was never brave enough to go for areas of soft tissue or any that might interfere with everyday bodily functions) and I think I probably stood out in a crowd. I certainly did at Durham where the majority of students were the jeans and t shirt type.
For me this was about my own stand against fashion. I have never been able to 'do' fashion, so my rebellion against that was to deliberately pick the most unfashionable clothes I could find. If it was obvious I wasn't trying then no one could mock me for failing. I liked wearing my eccentric clothes and not caring if people hated them. Then I discovered that I fit into what was then called the alternative scene (and may still be, for all I know). I could mix with a whole range of people who didn't judge on appearances.
My adventures in clothing and hair began when I was about 15 and ended when I was 21 and training to be a teacher. I decided that as a new teacher I did not need the extra attention that an eccentric appearance would attract...and then realised that I was happiest not caring about my clothes at all apart from whether they are clean, free from holes/stains (at least for work), and most importantly, comfortable! As you all know I have happily continued with this philosophy for the last 12 years.
I feel guilty now because I have digressed from the extremely serious topic of this post to waffle about my dress sense in 1995, but it was important to me to explain why I feel so much empathy for Sophie and what happened to her. When I was the same age as her it was very important to me to dress in the way I did, but I never dreamt it would make me a target. It didn't, but only because I didn't accidentally cross paths with a group of violent thugs who considered it sport to kick the crap out of an inoffensive young couple because they were dressed differently.
The attackers were sentenced today. I applaud the fact that all have been allowed to be named although they are under 18. I don't feel justice has been done in the lengths of the sentences. Sophie's two murderers may have got life imprisonment but I don't believe the minimum sentences should be so low as 16 and 18 years. That's crap anyway - life should mean life! I also felt the sentences on those convicted of assaulting Robert only were way too low - all under 6 years. When it is taken into account that Sophie's murderers had already been convicted of a similar assault, yet were still free to carry out this one, you realise that sentencing is not necessarily carried out to protect the safety of the public. Scary and sad.
This bright, pretty young woman had a promising future ahead of her. She was taking a gap year before starting an English degree at university. She had recently moved in with her boyfriend of several years, Robert Maltby, a talented art student. All of that was snatched away by a group of teenage thugs who found it entertaining to attack first Robert, then Sophie, and kick them both into unconciousness.
According to the reports, Robert and Sophie were walking home from a friend's house late one night when they fell into conversation with a group of five teenagers. At first the group were friendly but suddenly one of them decided to turn on Robert and the rest of them followed. As Sophie held Robert's head in her lap and pleaded with the attackers to stop, two of them turned the violence towards her. This sickening and unprovoked attack resulted in both Sophie and Robert lying comatose in hospital with severe head injuries. Sophie never recovered and died two weeks later. Robert has only made a partial recovery.
The more you learn of the details of this crime, the more revolting it becomes. Brendan Harris, one of Sophie's murderers, and his mother, were laughing and joking during his initial arrest and police interview. The court reports and police press statements talk of this as being one of many examples of a total lack of remorse on the part of all five attackers. The teenage witnesses who testified against the attackers did so in the face of real fear of recriminations. Sophie's family were jeered at outside the court. This would be all be sickening enough if it were adults involved, but those who committed this hideous crime and acted as though it were a badge of honour are CHILDREN. They are all now aged between 15 and 17, so it is possible some of them were as young as 14 at the time of the attack. I teach this age group, and I am in no doubt that they are still children. How does it come to be that children can see this behaviour as something to entertain, to laugh and joke about, whilst their victims and their families try to pick up the pieces of their lives?
I know that the main reason that Sophie's murder has particularly affected me is because of the reason that the group decided to attack her and Robert; that they were dressed differently. I don't see Sophie as being that different from the 20 year old me. If you had met me when I was 20 you would have encountered a bizarrely dressed final year maths student. I would probably have been wearing a tie dyed top, long skirt with a paisley pattern, 14 hole Doc Martens with rainbow laces, and an enormous green army surplus coat. Add in the waist length hair of a colour that would stop traffic lights and four pairs of earrings (I liked the piercing thing but was never brave enough to go for areas of soft tissue or any that might interfere with everyday bodily functions) and I think I probably stood out in a crowd. I certainly did at Durham where the majority of students were the jeans and t shirt type.
For me this was about my own stand against fashion. I have never been able to 'do' fashion, so my rebellion against that was to deliberately pick the most unfashionable clothes I could find. If it was obvious I wasn't trying then no one could mock me for failing. I liked wearing my eccentric clothes and not caring if people hated them. Then I discovered that I fit into what was then called the alternative scene (and may still be, for all I know). I could mix with a whole range of people who didn't judge on appearances.
My adventures in clothing and hair began when I was about 15 and ended when I was 21 and training to be a teacher. I decided that as a new teacher I did not need the extra attention that an eccentric appearance would attract...and then realised that I was happiest not caring about my clothes at all apart from whether they are clean, free from holes/stains (at least for work), and most importantly, comfortable! As you all know I have happily continued with this philosophy for the last 12 years.
I feel guilty now because I have digressed from the extremely serious topic of this post to waffle about my dress sense in 1995, but it was important to me to explain why I feel so much empathy for Sophie and what happened to her. When I was the same age as her it was very important to me to dress in the way I did, but I never dreamt it would make me a target. It didn't, but only because I didn't accidentally cross paths with a group of violent thugs who considered it sport to kick the crap out of an inoffensive young couple because they were dressed differently.
The attackers were sentenced today. I applaud the fact that all have been allowed to be named although they are under 18. I don't feel justice has been done in the lengths of the sentences. Sophie's two murderers may have got life imprisonment but I don't believe the minimum sentences should be so low as 16 and 18 years. That's crap anyway - life should mean life! I also felt the sentences on those convicted of assaulting Robert only were way too low - all under 6 years. When it is taken into account that Sophie's murderers had already been convicted of a similar assault, yet were still free to carry out this one, you realise that sentencing is not necessarily carried out to protect the safety of the public. Scary and sad.
Friday, April 11, 2008
I can't think of titles
Holiday
I have booked our holiday! First of all there is the huge sense of relief that I have finally made a decision (of course Andy helped, but I was still dithering) and now there is the holiday countdown to enjoy.
For the last three years we have been to Dawlish Warren in Devon which is an ideal place for families with small children, but this year we thought it was time for a change. We decided to explore another part of the south coast and look for something in the area around Weymouth. We prefer to stay on holiday parks so there is lots for the girls to do, but usually choose a chalet or a bungalow in preference to a caravan. I really didn't want to choose a caravan (my blood runs cold at the thought of it shaking as the girls thunder up and down it, and they are always packed so close together) but surprisingly most of the parks in the area seemed to be almost exclusively caravans only...very nice caravans some of them, but caravans nonetheless.
So, this time we have chosen something a little bit different. We have opted for a park which is about 8 miles inland, in the countryside. It's in a woodland setting so there should be plenty of interesting things for the girls to spot and places to explore. Our accomodation is a lodge (wow, sounds posh, although probably not THAT posh) and as we have both been working very hard in the last few months we decided to pay a bit extra for it to have a few mod cons like a DVD player and a dishwasher. There is an indoor pool as well as a soft play area so the girls won't be bored if the weather is bad. Oooh, the excitement is building!
Tags
I should do my other two tags but I feel inordinately guilty about tagging other people. But then I feel guilty because I haven't done my tags. Sam, you are to blame for this dilemma! (but I still love you)
Non musician
I am still recovering from my attempt to play the piano at Mass this afternoon. In my defence a) I have played the piano properly twice in the last 5 years (maybe more, but that's how long I can be certain about) and b) I got the music at 4:30 pm yesterday and had my first opportunity to practice it an hour and a quarter before Mass started. Considering my mitigating circumstances, it was not a disaster...there were a few 'interesting' harmonies, but I managed to keep going. It was all a bit stressful though, and I think the moral of the story is that I need to get my piano moved here (although I did request a little more notice of future occasions!) My piano dwells at my Dad's, as it has since I moved out nearly 10 years ago - and of course for quite a few years before that. My first house was too small for it, and moving it here is one of those things I have never really got round to.
I have booked our holiday! First of all there is the huge sense of relief that I have finally made a decision (of course Andy helped, but I was still dithering) and now there is the holiday countdown to enjoy.
For the last three years we have been to Dawlish Warren in Devon which is an ideal place for families with small children, but this year we thought it was time for a change. We decided to explore another part of the south coast and look for something in the area around Weymouth. We prefer to stay on holiday parks so there is lots for the girls to do, but usually choose a chalet or a bungalow in preference to a caravan. I really didn't want to choose a caravan (my blood runs cold at the thought of it shaking as the girls thunder up and down it, and they are always packed so close together) but surprisingly most of the parks in the area seemed to be almost exclusively caravans only...very nice caravans some of them, but caravans nonetheless.
So, this time we have chosen something a little bit different. We have opted for a park which is about 8 miles inland, in the countryside. It's in a woodland setting so there should be plenty of interesting things for the girls to spot and places to explore. Our accomodation is a lodge (wow, sounds posh, although probably not THAT posh) and as we have both been working very hard in the last few months we decided to pay a bit extra for it to have a few mod cons like a DVD player and a dishwasher. There is an indoor pool as well as a soft play area so the girls won't be bored if the weather is bad. Oooh, the excitement is building!
Tags
I should do my other two tags but I feel inordinately guilty about tagging other people. But then I feel guilty because I haven't done my tags. Sam, you are to blame for this dilemma! (but I still love you)
Non musician
I am still recovering from my attempt to play the piano at Mass this afternoon. In my defence a) I have played the piano properly twice in the last 5 years (maybe more, but that's how long I can be certain about) and b) I got the music at 4:30 pm yesterday and had my first opportunity to practice it an hour and a quarter before Mass started. Considering my mitigating circumstances, it was not a disaster...there were a few 'interesting' harmonies, but I managed to keep going. It was all a bit stressful though, and I think the moral of the story is that I need to get my piano moved here (although I did request a little more notice of future occasions!) My piano dwells at my Dad's, as it has since I moved out nearly 10 years ago - and of course for quite a few years before that. My first house was too small for it, and moving it here is one of those things I have never really got round to.
Saturday, March 29, 2008
Tagged part one
I am making a concerted effort to catch up with Sam's tags. I have a backlog of three to do, so here is installment one. For this one I have to tell you 6 random things about myself and then tag 3 more people.
1. I love watching Formula One racing but sadly that pastime has been killed off somewhat since I became a mother. It's hard to keep up with tyre and fuel strategies and who is where and doing what with a constant little voice piping up "Is that Michael Schumacher?". The stock answer has of course changed from "in that red car with a number one on it, miles in front of everyone else" to "Michael Schumacher isn't in it any more". I did get around the problem by videoing the race and making painstaking efforts not to inadvertently find out the result before watching it, but I have failed to learn how to record on the new video.
This is difficult...I am really not that interesting a person....
2. I have always lived in odd numbered houses. I find this interesting even if no one else does.
3. I have never been on an aeroplane. This is not through fear but just because I haven't got round to it! I have been abroad three times but always by land/sea.
4. This year it will be 14 years since I met Andy and 10 years since we got married.
5. I have busked outside Shakespeare's birthplace in Stratford. A group of us from my A-level music course (ok, it was a few years ago) went along one sunny spring day and sang English Madrigals which went down a storm with the tourists and earned us enough money for a couple of pints in the pub for us all afterwards :)
6. I have been photographed for a newspaper on a miniature railway with Cheggers!
Right, now I have to find three people to tag....(please don't hate me!)
Elly
Liz
Amanda
1. I love watching Formula One racing but sadly that pastime has been killed off somewhat since I became a mother. It's hard to keep up with tyre and fuel strategies and who is where and doing what with a constant little voice piping up "Is that Michael Schumacher?". The stock answer has of course changed from "in that red car with a number one on it, miles in front of everyone else" to "Michael Schumacher isn't in it any more". I did get around the problem by videoing the race and making painstaking efforts not to inadvertently find out the result before watching it, but I have failed to learn how to record on the new video.
This is difficult...I am really not that interesting a person....
2. I have always lived in odd numbered houses. I find this interesting even if no one else does.
3. I have never been on an aeroplane. This is not through fear but just because I haven't got round to it! I have been abroad three times but always by land/sea.
4. This year it will be 14 years since I met Andy and 10 years since we got married.
5. I have busked outside Shakespeare's birthplace in Stratford. A group of us from my A-level music course (ok, it was a few years ago) went along one sunny spring day and sang English Madrigals which went down a storm with the tourists and earned us enough money for a couple of pints in the pub for us all afterwards :)
6. I have been photographed for a newspaper on a miniature railway with Cheggers!
Right, now I have to find three people to tag....(please don't hate me!)
Elly
Liz
Amanda
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